Life is Bizarre???

I was reading on someone's FB and it had mentioned that life is bizarre. At first I agreed just because life is bizarre. But I don't know if it's the hidden etymologist in me but I started playing with the word bizarre...thinking about Bizarre Foods on the travel channel, all the bazaar's (actually just flea markets) that my mom dragged me to in Germany. Then it hit me...

Life is Bizarre and Life is a Bazaar.

Life is bizarre in that it is unexpected and sometimes weird. Things happen and we can't explain them. It's just the way life is...heck, if everything was as expected and nothing ever surprised us...it may not be as exciting (although sometimes I prefer the less exciting...refer to my Math... blog).

However, life is a bazaar! I never realized it when I was a kid but now I do. Even though I loathed getting up early on a Saturday morning to go rummage through someone else's junk at a fleamarket in Germany, I secretly enjoyed looking at all the stuff and finding some good deals! And that's how life is. There are so many opportunities out there. You just have to find the deal that best suits you. And don't ever take anything for face value. Do a little research if you can.

Not sure where this blog ended up but I did have a good idea when I started. So, I guess you always have to be mindful of opportunities that come up in life. However, they may not always be as great as the "seller" is saying it is. But you may find a treasure amongst all the trash...keep your eyes peeled!

That's What Friends Are For...

Last night I realized just how great friends are! Families are awesome to but there is something about having a great friend. I think with a family, they have to accept you for who you are. You could be a total jerk and your family would shrug it off and say…”oh that’s just my brother.” When it comes to friends, they have a choice to be friends with you or not. And to have them accept you for who you are is amazing. I realized that last night when I was catching up with a good friend of mine who I hadn’t talked with in ages! Even though it was just through text, it was great to catch up! I highly recommend to anyone reading this to call or text an old friend just to catch up…you won’t regret it!

So, that’s my blog for today. Kinda short and sweet…er…simple.

Math??? In Real Life???

So today I was thinking about math. Kinda weird since I hate math! Even though I did ace my first math class just recently in college, it is still a subject I would rather avoid like the plague. But anyways, I was thinking about functions, matrices, square roots...and how every math teacher explained that math can be related to any every day activity in life. WHAT?!?! When am I ever going to use a matrix in real life??? Definitely not while I'm balancing my check book or paying my phone bill. "Hah!" I thought, "you (my math professors) are all wrong." But as I thought about it more, they are kind of right. To get to the point, I have come to the conclusion that people are like algebra (I think). There are two types...variables and constants.

Here is my definitions:

First, there are constants. They are what they are and nothing is going to change them (unless you take the square root and...just kidding). But really, if you look at a constant, you'll see someone that is like a sine wave. Up and down, up and down...pretty predictable, unless you throw another constant or variable into the mix. So...pretty stable. I believe these are the folks that pay their phone bills on time, come to a complete stop at a stop sign, and are conservative Republicans...hahaha. Just kidding. I think these are the folks that believe in the slow and steady theory and even though it may take a long time, they end up on top.

Someone that's a variable can be anything they want to be. They can do whatever they want, go wherever they want...pretty much whatever. These are the people you usually see on social website pictures having parties, doing shots or doing something exciting that you aren't doing. It's a lifestyle often emulated in movies such as Up In The Air (good movie by the way). It can be fun being a variable and it may well just work for many people. However, I believe that it can go either way. You can either come out on top or you can come out down and out...the outcome varies.

I'm not saying either way is wrong or right...it was just a conclusion that I came to today. I believe I'm a constant. What are you?

A Durable Heart

It's a good thing that the human heart is a durable organ. In an average 70 year old's lifetime, the heart will beat 2.52 billion times! That is a lot of beats! If only the other heart were as durable... :( Maybe mine is a glutton for punishment. It always wants to be there when it knows it shouldn't. Even after being kicked around it still wants to help. Weird huh? It would be neat to have that remote from the movie Click or have TIVO for my life. That way, I can fast forward through the bad parts to the good parts...hopefully they aren't too far off.

I think the heart is also a confused human piece. It just doesn't know when to quit...that's probably good because I don't want mine quitting on me...not at least for another 2 billion beats. :) But unfortunately for many people, such as myself, my heart is bigger than my brain...you wouldn't think that by looking at my huge head. My heart is a box in round 10 that's been pummeled to a pulp but is unwilling to hit the mat. So, I bid farewell to my heart because my body and mind are taking the dive! It's time to pull the plug.

Sheesh...this was a horrible post...thank for heart for this one...maybe the next one will be better because my head should be running the show then.

Ingredients...

After using the restroom at work today, I washed my hands in front of this huge mirror. Checking for zits, stray nose hairs or crumbs around my mouth from lunch, I happened to catch my own eyes...then I just stared and wondered...what makes me who I am??? I know...I know...bone, muscles, tissue, fat and fluids...but what about the other stuff. There's more to me than that right??? The more I thought about it, that's a really hard question to answer. There are some things I know about myself but I want to find out the rest. Here's what I do know:

- I'm a proud father of two beautiful kids...miss you guys!
- I'm a brother and son to an awesome family...miss you guys to!
- I work in a pretty cool unit with the Alaska Air National Guard.
- I have very few close friends but those close friends mean the world to me.

Is that it though? I think this trip to Alaska for 30 days is going to give me an opportunity to figure out what Michael Buck is really made of. I'll report back later of the results.

Ramblings of a tipsy guy....

The worst hurt ever.
I feel that it is probably worse than losing a limb(not that I've lost a limb but I can only imagine), having a loved one die or even dying yourself. The worst hurt ever is knowing that the one that your are head over heals in love with is in love with someone else and you are nothing to them. Maybe that's a stupid teenage thing but I can't imagine anything worse. Knowing that you would do anything for someone but to them, you are nothing. That has got to be the worst. If there is anything worse, I would love to hear it.

Pt. II
Distrations are great.
I think distractions are great...they just don't last long enough. Working out for example is an example. While I work out, I focus on nothing but myself...but when I'm done, everything else comes back into view. That sucks...
Ah well...not a very good blog posting but it's what I'm feeling.

Christmas Decorations

Well, the Christmas tree at my mom's house is finally gone. The outside Christmas lights are still up though. I think in a funny way it's kind of a representation of me. Trees and lights are major symbols of the Christmas holiday. No matter what kind of trick you may use to try and keep the tree alive (aspirin, sugar or tree food), it's still dying...if not already dead. But for some reason, people still hold onto it for even a month after the holiday season (so I've heard). I think right now I'm in the process of "cleaning up" after the holidays. I believe the tree is gone, sometimes to hard to accept but it's gone. But, there is definitely lots of needles left to pick up. Maybe I should get a leaf blower...

Reflection

One of my sisters and my neighbor stopped by to chat yesterday...and in our conversations, I came to a realization. No regrets. I'm not sorry for anything that has happened and if I could go back and change the past, I wouldn't. If, on the day that I met my ex back in 2002, I knew exactly what was going to happen in November 2009, I would still have introduced myself and would still be totally interested in her. I realized that I would still have wanted a relationship because of all the wonderful things that has happened in the five years that we were married. If I would've stayed away, I would have avoided the heartache but I would've missed out on lots of wonderful things. Here's a quick list:

- Saw amazing sights in CA like Ft. Rosecrans National park.
- Took an awesome road trip from CA to IN - saw some really cool sights.
- Took an awesome road trip on the PCH from San Jose down to Lancaster, CA.
- Eloped to Vegas! I think that's pretty cool.
- Stood in the same line that Britney Spears stood in to get a marriage license.
- Felt my unborn son moving.
- Took an amazing road trip from CA to AK - this was a tough one but just amazing!
- Was there for the birth of my son...one of my top three moments in my life!
- Had some really cool experiences in AK.
- Was there for the birth of my daughter...one of my top three moments in life!
- Shared a tough, but fun road trip with my family from AK to TX.

It's kind of funny though that all of the amazing things that has happened in my life are overshadowed by one dark moment. But in talking with my friend and my sister...I wouldn't have changed a thing.

It's kind of like that Mastercard commercial. Instead of being priceless though...there was a price that I had to pay for these wonderful moments. And in reflection, I'm glad I paid the price.

Tis the new year!

OK...let's try something new. It's the new year...out with the old Mike and in with, not a new Mike, but the same one...just a little bit smarter.. If you don't know, last year was an OK year...except for the last two months. The year started off good. I had a full time job with the Air Guard, I had a wife that loved me and two beautiful kids. Then we took an arduous, but fun, trip from Alaska all the way down to Texas. Things were OK until November. That's when the bomb was dropped on me. I found out that my wife of almost 5 years is in love with someone else and that they are planning their life together after me. So...2009 did not end on a good note.



So, out with the old Mike and in with, not a new Mike, but the same one. Hopefully smarter though that's for sure. The upgraded version of me is definitely going to be a lot more guarded...sorry ladies. I think I will follow my head a lot more. It's always good to follow your heart but my cousin said to let me head win once in a while. Good advice. I also plan on being more driven. The old Mike was driven but he happened to let things come to him more often. I've several goals for myself once I get back to Alaska. Check back often to see if I've met those goals.



1. Get a J-O-B!

1a. Get my own set of wheels.

1b. Get out on my own again.

2. Get into MMA...not because I've got some anger issues or anything but it'll help me get fit and it will help with focusing...I hope.

3. Rugby??? I played rugby in college. I might see about playing with the local club here...not sure on this one yet though.



So, these are my goals for 2010. Hopefully I can meet all of them...scratch that. I am going to meet all of them.



Happy New Year!

Is this a dance?!

Here it goes:

I don't think there is anything more difficult than trying to move on. I could only guess that it would be easier to turn lead into gold. There are times that I feel better and that things are going to be ok but there's always something, whether it be a song, a TV show or movie, that sends me back to square one. It's almost like taking one step forward and then two steps back.

First post...hopefully ones in the future are a little better and not just ramblings...